In love, we often hear this question whenever we get our hearts broken: &ldquo;Hanggang kailan ka magpapakatanga?&rdquo; It's a wake-up call masked as a joke, something that our friends can&rsquo;t help but ask out of concern. After all, giving someone another chance isn&rsquo;t just a matter of patience&mdash;it&rsquo;s about how much of yourself you&rsquo;re willing to risk, and how long you're willing to wait for change that may never come.
We all want to believe in the magic of second chances. Wala namang perfect. Sino bang hindi nagkakamali, &lsquo;di ba? But when those &ldquo;one more chances&rdquo; start piling up, when the apologies become more vague as time passes, and when promises to change feel like recycled lines from the same script&mdash;you have to ask yourself: Are they still growing or are you the one who&rsquo;s regressing?
A "one more chance" usually happens after the first real heartbreak. There&rsquo;s still the hope that maybe this pain is just part of the process. Forgiving and forgetting is easier because you trust that they&rsquo;ll learn from the mistake. Maybe things will change after your talk. Perhaps they&rsquo;ll never do it again.
But sometimes, that one more chance becomes the start of a cycle.
The second time is supposed to be the last straw&mdash;the "if you mess up again, I'm gone" line in the sand. But when emotions are involved, it&rsquo;s never that easy. What if this time it&rsquo;s different? What if they&rsquo;re really sorry?
Second chances are trickier. They test your boundaries, make you question your worth, and drive you crazier than you were before.&nbsp;
Then there are those who give unlimited chances&mdash;the ones who stay even after the lies, the ghosting, the red flags waving like they're in a parade. It's a space of endless hope, but also endless hurt. You justify their actions, defend them to your friends, and tell yourself, &ldquo;Maybe I&rsquo;m the problem.&rdquo;
But you&rsquo;re not.
Love without accountability isn't love&mdash;it&rsquo;s self-sacrifice.
You don&rsquo;t need to time your exit with someone else&rsquo;s healing. It&rsquo;s okay to love them and still choose yourself. Chances are a gift and not a guarantee. And when someone keeps wasting that gift, maybe it&rsquo;s time to stop giving.