RELATIONSHIP AND SEX
Letter for papa
June 14, 2019
LETTER FOR PAPA
This world has a million reasons why you are the best papa for me.
My life is too short and everyday is not enough to prove that you are exactly the man that I need in my life.
So maybe you can give me this day and let me pour my heart out in a letter.
There was a day in my life that I questioned God on how He do His family tree. Why did I end up with you? Why are you my papa? And I can’t help but compare you from other dads. I always ask myself, “what if her dad was my dad?” or maybe “what if my dad was richer?” Or “what if my papa was a King? What kind of life will I have?”
I have so many questions while I was growing up. And it was harder to answer them when you left us for work. It was harder to bring the puzzle pieces in while you were on a different time zone. My questions became harder and harder to answer that I decided to let them go. After all, you are the only one who can answer them, but you were not there.
So, life went on. I had the chance to grow up with you around and had some of my first-time experiences with you. You were there. Just there. But we never talked about how I braved each day. How I got over my first heart break, how I handled my first fight with friends, how I passed a semester even if I cried over algebra. I had to go through a lot, and you were there. But I never felt you.
So, again, life went on. I have to face life on my own now, as in total independence from you and mama. And I thought, I can get through it. I can get through this adult life away from you and mama. I can handle it. After all, I handled growing up without your guidance and trying to do things on my own.
I never knew that the moment I tried to stand on my own was the very moment that I needed you.
I needed you now more than the time I needed you when I was trying to get over my first heart break. I never thought that life will be this tough.
I wanted a lot of things. I wanted to meet a lot of people. But I never thought that at the end of a tough week, I just wanted to go home in your embrace and watch TV with you.
I’ve been to different places in the world and, sure, they made me happy. But I never wanted to be happy, I wanted to find peace and I found it the moment I went home to you.
And on those simple moments, my little questions when I was younger were given answers. That if you were not my papa then maybe I would not have braved life. And maybe if you’re not papa, I still do not know what love is…because it’s not you whom I’m going home to.